Dear K' Rogers,
It's important that you know from the outset that I'm no uber greenie. Or, environ-nazi. (Is that even a thing? If not, it is now.) I don't even have kids, and how the fuck long am I gonna live? I mean, I hope a good long time provided I'm in good health and sharp mind, ya know? ...What? Another 40 years if I'm lucky? So there's only soooo much I'm willing at this moment in time to do to save the world. Sorry if you find that offensive, but I'm tellin' you my truth.
Some things I'm willing to do to help the earth, and, well, other things I'm just not. I'm willing and happy to recycle. Of course that's because it's pretty easy as they don't require us to really do any sorting. In the blue can with the wheels it goes if it's recyclable. Easy. I'm in.
I'm willing to unplug a lot of things not used daily or at least frequently. Frankly, I don't even know what that does, except save a few pennies over the course of a year on my electric bill, but "they" say it's good to do, and it's not too much of a hassle so I do it. (Hummm.... Now that I think about it, I think the "they" I speak of here is that lil' crazy cartoon lightning bug fella that told me that. Who says advertising doesn't work?!?)
Conversely, there are things even though I have an understanding of the ecological, geopolitical and financial ramifications, that even though I think I probably should be doing as part of 'my part', I...well, am not fuckin' there yet, and maybe never will be. Things like not driving a big ol' hulkin' American made, gas guzzlin', road hoggin' SUV. I'm sorry. I know a smaller or hybrid is better for the world, but that's not who this BBG is. Viva the SUV! I like bein' 'up there'. I don't think I can ever go back to being down there. I just can't. Nay, I won't. (shakes fists intensely) In wee acquiescence, I do try to coordinate my errands so that I'm using the most concise route known to me. So I do, do that. (no matter how old I am the word do-do is still a funny)
So that's where I am on the spectrum of not giving a rats ass about the environment vs. actually hugging a tree, ok? Ima nut for writing this, but I'm not a nut about being green, got it?
It's important to make this distinction, so that you understand the gravitas of my following question;
Why the hell must I have twice as many fuckin' lil' plastic baggies as I have actual grocery items?
Every fuckin' time I come back from the grocery I have waaaaay the fuck too many of your lil' baggies.
I understand not wanting to overload bags, 'cause I'm betting customers complaining about damaged goods from a broken bag ain't your idea of a good way to spend the time of your staff. And I understand avoiding, or minimizing some cross contamination opportunities. Super, thank you. But come the fuck on man. I had 17 bags after my last visit. I barely bought one of those mini carts full of stuff. Seriously, I almost went to the 15 and under line, but thought I might have one or two more than that and was too lazy to count-- and frankly, never really know if two of the same items is considered one or 2, ya know? I realize that sounds stupid...Clearly I know it's two individual items, but if you lured me into buying two on one of 'dem there two-fer deals, is it reeeeeally two items? Or at that point is it considered one unit. Like I say, I donno, but I don't like to be a cheater, so I generally just get in a regular line.
For as little as I was picking up, 17 bags seems excessive. Is there some kinda kick back or payola type thing going on with you and the plastic bag manufacturers?
I know, I know, I could chose paper or have one of those reuse-y bags. But instead of me changing my way of doin' things, could you just train your baggers that some things can be put together in the plastic bags and that the bags are capable of securely holding more than 5 ounces of groceries? Could that happen?
It's important that you know from the outset that I'm no uber greenie. Or, environ-nazi. (Is that even a thing? If not, it is now.) I don't even have kids, and how the fuck long am I gonna live? I mean, I hope a good long time provided I'm in good health and sharp mind, ya know? ...What? Another 40 years if I'm lucky? So there's only soooo much I'm willing at this moment in time to do to save the world. Sorry if you find that offensive, but I'm tellin' you my truth.
Some things I'm willing to do to help the earth, and, well, other things I'm just not. I'm willing and happy to recycle. Of course that's because it's pretty easy as they don't require us to really do any sorting. In the blue can with the wheels it goes if it's recyclable. Easy. I'm in.
I'm willing to unplug a lot of things not used daily or at least frequently. Frankly, I don't even know what that does, except save a few pennies over the course of a year on my electric bill, but "they" say it's good to do, and it's not too much of a hassle so I do it. (Hummm.... Now that I think about it, I think the "they" I speak of here is that lil' crazy cartoon lightning bug fella that told me that. Who says advertising doesn't work?!?)
So that's where I am on the spectrum of not giving a rats ass about the environment vs. actually hugging a tree, ok? Ima nut for writing this, but I'm not a nut about being green, got it?
It's important to make this distinction, so that you understand the gravitas of my following question;
Why the hell must I have twice as many fuckin' lil' plastic baggies as I have actual grocery items?
Every fuckin' time I come back from the grocery I have waaaaay the fuck too many of your lil' baggies.
I understand not wanting to overload bags, 'cause I'm betting customers complaining about damaged goods from a broken bag ain't your idea of a good way to spend the time of your staff. And I understand avoiding, or minimizing some cross contamination opportunities. Super, thank you. But come the fuck on man. I had 17 bags after my last visit. I barely bought one of those mini carts full of stuff. Seriously, I almost went to the 15 and under line, but thought I might have one or two more than that and was too lazy to count-- and frankly, never really know if two of the same items is considered one or 2, ya know? I realize that sounds stupid...Clearly I know it's two individual items, but if you lured me into buying two on one of 'dem there two-fer deals, is it reeeeeally two items? Or at that point is it considered one unit. Like I say, I donno, but I don't like to be a cheater, so I generally just get in a regular line.
For as little as I was picking up, 17 bags seems excessive. Is there some kinda kick back or payola type thing going on with you and the plastic bag manufacturers?
I know, I know, I could chose paper or have one of those reuse-y bags. But instead of me changing my way of doin' things, could you just train your baggers that some things can be put together in the plastic bags and that the bags are capable of securely holding more than 5 ounces of groceries? Could that happen?
(One bag. Three items.)
(One bag. Two items.)
(One bag. One item. It's a bagel. Notice how it's already in a bag.)
If I could come home with fewer baggies than actual groceries, that would be great. Come on Kroger, let's do just a little sumthin' to help the planet, huh? Is it too much to ask? I'm doin' what I can, please do the same. I'm probably not gonna be around in 150 years, but you might be, and do you want customers thinkin' you're a bag wasting, landfill cluttering, planet killer, or a responsible corporate citizen?
Love,
Love,
BBG
P.S. Also, if'n ya could mention to the people who wear gloves, that their wearin' o' gloves isn't to keep, for instance what I watched today, the bakery worker from being contaminated by the bread she was touching, but to keep her from contaminating the bread, that would be great. ...A lil' sumthin' I realized as I watched her use her gloved hand to put a bit of whatthefuckever bakery item in her mouth and then resume touching the loaves some unsuspecting customer is going to buy later today. Uh...eeeeeeww!
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